Viatouch Teacher Articles
Parent/Teacher Forum

Preparing for a Parent-Teacher Conference
by Cathy P. Miller

Most parents feel apprehensive when the school calls to schedule a parent-teacher conference. Teachers often feel the same. Get your meetings off on the right foot and lessen the anxiety on both sides to create a win-win situation.

Prepare and participate

Think about the student and the meeting ahead of time. Make a specific list of issues to address, but always start on a positive note. No matter which party schedules the meeting, prompt parents to think about their child's performance at school beforehand and list their concerns. As the meeting proceeds, record a mutual plan of action.

Whenever possible, avoid having parents face multiple educators. That can be intimidating and counter-productive. If it is necessary for a whole group to meet, suggest that another person (a guidance counselor, a family friend, a mutual acquaintance) attend too.

Acknowledge parents as essential team players in a child's education

Parents may not understand phonics or be able to calculate algebra problems. They can be interested in the child. Understand that parents know their child best and trust those intuitions. Look beyond the behavior problem to the core issue.

Focus on the child

Both teachers and parents can carry excess emotional baggage into these encounters. When the baggage gets in the way, a conversation can quickly escalate into an altercation. On the other hand, if both parties begin determined to help the child, positive results are more likely. Answering these questions can facilitate that approach:
     
     1. What does this student do well (academically, socially, emotionally)?
     2. What are specific areas that I am concerned about or would like to see improve?
     3. How can the school and the home environment work together to foster progress in
         this area?
     4. Are there learning ability or learning style issues?

Camille Dominguez, a teacher in Albuquerque, New Mexico, remembers one of her more difficult situations.

"Once I encountered a mother who was frustrated by her daughter's struggles in learning math. The mother sent me a note berating me for things out of my control, such as a poorly written textbook, and then called the principal to complain. I envisioned treating her the same way in an upcoming meeting, but I had to keep her daughter's, my student's, success in mind. Instead of reacting emotionally, I prepared notes on how the mother could help her daughter progress."

In turn, the parent moved away from those uncontrollable issues and toward a more constructive approach. Attitude is everything in getting both parents and teachers to enter the meeting determined to help the child.

Allow the student to participate in at least part of the meeting

When my son, Charlie was 10, he struggled with organization. His principal wisely invited him to join us near the end of the meeting. This allowed Charlie to take charge of his own learning. We discussed the options he had for improvement and he chose what he thought would work best for him.

Review major points and any decisions made jointly

If parents are asked to supervise activities (reading with the child 15 minutes a day), make sure they leave with a note about it. Both parties should clearly understand any actions agreed upon. If another meeting is warranted, make plans together before leaving. Be specific about expectations for the student (and each other) and follow through. End on a cordial note. Be determined to make it work and stay positive. You will discover that the child will benefit greatly.

Through varied avenues such as her award-winning Reading is for Everyone tutorial model, her contributions to Educationworld.com as their "Reading Coach" monthly columnist, and her training workshops for educators and parents, Cathy Puett Miller, The Literacy Ambassador, spends her time spreading the news that reading can be fun, powerful and practical. Her most recent projects involve collaborating as a service provider with preschool and after school supplemental initiatives in Alabama and Georgia. You can visit her K-12 website at www.readingisforeveryone.org or contact her directly for more information.